Last week I came back from a five day trip in Cabo San Lucas, Mexico. Really, we flew into Cabo and then took a Jeep car almost two hours out towards the coast, in the middle of nowhere. It was magical and I tried to keep a daily diary so that I could remember and share details of this trip.
The only instructions we had to the villa we were staying at was a piece of paper with very detailed writing- things like " drive a few miles until you see a cactus with a pink flower on it. Then, you'll know to turn right onto the second dirt road past it. Be careful not to go onto the first dirt road, it could be dangerous" and "watch out for cows and horses". I won't say who the person was that I went with on this trip, for I do not know that they would like to be mentioned. However that person was driving the Jeep, and this grown person was severely nervous, anxious and stiff- always worrying if we'd taken a wrong turn or if we were in the right area. I'd always say "Yes, we are. Do not worry. And, if we aren't, it's an adventure! It is why we are in Mexico, isn't it?" Now, I understand that we were in Mexico, and that It isn't always the safest of places to be in- however, sometimes it's important to let go, and have faith that you are where you're meant to be. Let's just say that after our arrival I was the self-designated Jeep-driver, the Indiana Jones who had to lead us through these jungle-like winding dirt roads for the next five days. It was awesome.
We'd stocked up on groceries right before hitting the dirt roads- our instruction paper mentioned that it would be wise, as that market next to the airport was the only one available from the two-hour away villa. The first left that we took off of the main road was a dirt one, flooded with giant pools of murky water from the summer monsoons that the town had just had. Barely-there houses and wild dogs were surrounding this road and I could hear my friend's breathing getting louder- nerves were coming in, and I forget sometimes that people are not always as adventurous as I am, or that most have not seen what I've seen. My friends' eyes were masked under sunglasses however I could read every inch of doubt and fear in their tense mouth. There was nothing that I wanted more than to shake this somberness out and to make this person let go. We are alive and we have an opportunity to see LIFE and REALITY when the majority of our lives are consumed with WORRIES and FANTASIES (especially in the fashion/entertainment industry).
I soon realized my purpose for this trip- to be a model and muse, yes, but more so to be a light, to make this person live again, to open this person's eyes and change their perspective and outlook.
It wasn't easy. I'm someone who is genuinely happy, curious, content and in awe of the beauty that the Earth provides us with every day. The orange hued morning light that softly caresses my bed in the morning, the vast untouched miles of land that glow green because of the rains, the tart deep raspberry red fruit that I discovered, the humorous cows that couldn't give a care that I was coming towards them in a Jeep. My friend would say "why don't those cows move, how annoying" and I'd laugh and say "those cows are funny. Good for them. Character, I LIKE it!". There are always two ways of looking at things...I choose to be happy. There's a decision to be made.
It wasn't easy when everything I'd say was torn down and argued for the simple desire to argue. When someone is so stubborn, that they are holding themselves back. I could tell that my friend so badly wanted to change outlook, so badly wanted to rejoice instead of whine, so badly wanted to get out of their head, and I KNEW that that was why I was sent to be with this person for five days. It was my mission, to crack this person out of their comfortable bitterness. And if you know me, you know that I am stubborn and I will not give up. I didn't.
It's a tropical home-y mansion with tiles and woods and fairy-like white airy curtains, breathing in and out of each room, as the wind inhales and exhales - like a dream, or like that first scene with Daisy in The Great Gatsby. The main entrance is at once indoor and outdoor- it is a living room and yet birds come and go as they please, and branches of trees, vines are growing into it and onto the ceilings. It is a haven. The Villa is owned by three of the most generous women- who all grew up together and decided to build this dream location for their families. There are six houses. We had a house to ourselves, but basically had the whole Villa and beach to ourselves, because no one else was staying in this Villa, and there was no other Villa surrounding us within miles.
I'd never really been to a place like this. My half of the house was beautiful- with a bed (covered in Mexican colorful blankets) facing the two French-style open doors overlooking the purest blue ocean. Everything around me was silent; I could here the curtains whipping gently in the wind, brushing the doors. I could hear the crackles of little animals wandering in the nature surrounding me. I could hear little birds singing and waves crashing softly in a continuous mantra-like way. I could actually hear MYSELF and I quickly understood why moments like these are important, and why humans seclude themselves from time to time on 'vacation'. To come back to one's roots, to reground, to recharge peacefully.
Excerpts from my journal:
" I am falling asleep- a good sleep. I can barely keep my eyes open. Doors are wide open, as my soul is to the Earth. I am well. I hope my mom knows I'm alright. I have no reception. I am thankful"
"I wake up to the sound of the ocean, soft Bob Marley playing, and my friend singing along outside. People sing when they are happy. Life is good"
" Day 1 in Cabo. Let me just say, before explaining my day, that I couldn't receive any internet and it kills me! I want you to know that I want you. I want to be with you. I'm happy with you and it's a given, it is something so natural. I tried to have the internet work in the lobby for a couple of hours, to wish you happy birthday, with no success. However, I did find some wild cats and managed to receive scratches all over my arms! I didn't actually realize that they were wild until I started 'playing' with them, and soon after had to run up on the lobby couch to escape their gnaws around my ankles. Anyway, don't forget to smile. Big bisous partout, Alex" ( so apparently I fell asleep after this message and I didn't explain my day. That happens the morning after)
"...I think throughout yesterday I changed outfits five times. Anyway- we decide to go snorkeling, and I take the wheel. I'm Jeeping through this one dirt road, zigzagging & sometimes hitting a flat stretch-miles of jungle green terrain (sorry but Donkey Kong's "home" seems to always pop up in my head). I can't help but have a giant smile on my face, my heart is pulsing and every inch of my body is alive and wired as I speed down these bumpy dirt roads, not knowing what lies ahead past each sharp turn...We climb aboard the Black Maria and stop at our first coral reef. I put my mask and flippers on and jump into the warm sea. The bubbles disperse and I am surrounded by a school of parrot fish- they are NOT afraid of me, and I am at once enamored and slightly frightened as I know that those strong bird-like beaks could totally chop off my finger. I was aware of that...On our way to the second reef we pass by a huge boulder of sea lions. They're just chilling in the sun, though my friend had the impulse to stop the boat and request that we dive and approach the lions. Awesome idea. 'Poof!' I'm in the water again. I see the colossal boulder in front of me and swim towards it, when suddenly those bubbles surround me again and as they begin to fade, a giant dark shadow slinks by me. I panic for a second- it's a sea lion. And it is HUGE. MASSIVE. And, I'm curious again. So, I decide to follow the massive sea lion and observe some sort of love dance that it was having with another lion. They were intertwined in a DNA-like structure, twirling and twirling in rhythmic circles. A good forty minutes go by of swimming with these sea lions. I sing to them under water, convinced that they can hear me. Though these creatures were massive they were gentle. And, they truly didn't care about us humans. That's the way it should be"
"My friend looked HAPPY today! It's working. My energy is transmitting to this person, finally. Thank goodness. I am doing my job. Also, I was in the lobby last night. It was dark, pitch-black, with night hawks and bats flying around, zipping up the staircases and hovering down over me. I was sitting on the floor with my cracked-screened Ipad, charging it in the only plug that I could find, under a lamp table. As I was waiting for my technology to awaken, I took my flashlight and shone it onto different spots all around in front of me. I stopped it on a Magic 8 ball, tucked and peeking out of a sand-colored basket, on a middle shelf across the room. I picked it up, then impulsively, without even thinking about it, asked a very important question. I wouldn't have been surprised with a 'No' or conflicting answer as obviously this was a Magic 8 ball and it is silly. However every single time I shook that ball, it came with the same answer. Every. Single. Time. Coincidence? Or, do I take it partially to heart because in reality I know what I want, and the Magic ball is a reassurance of what I do want? Interesting to think about."
There are many details about this trip that I wish I could share- however by now I've written quite a bit and some things are better kept for ones self. Although you may want to beg to differ, I actually DID work and shoot, three different series of photos. Though I don't mention those because I know that that was not necessarily my true purpose for being sent to Mexico with this friend. This friend needed a light, even for a moment, and if I was able to instill some sort of mental peace in this person, then I am happy, because that was my mission and I wanted for this person to feel alive. Like I do.
I am thankful for all of the blessings and opportunities that I have in my life.
And, I know that I have much to give.
X.
I'd never really been to a place like this. My half of the house was beautiful- with a bed (covered in Mexican colorful blankets) facing the two French-style open doors overlooking the purest blue ocean. Everything around me was silent; I could here the curtains whipping gently in the wind, brushing the doors. I could hear the crackles of little animals wandering in the nature surrounding me. I could hear little birds singing and waves crashing softly in a continuous mantra-like way. I could actually hear MYSELF and I quickly understood why moments like these are important, and why humans seclude themselves from time to time on 'vacation'. To come back to one's roots, to reground, to recharge peacefully.
Excerpts from my journal:
" I am falling asleep- a good sleep. I can barely keep my eyes open. Doors are wide open, as my soul is to the Earth. I am well. I hope my mom knows I'm alright. I have no reception. I am thankful"
"I wake up to the sound of the ocean, soft Bob Marley playing, and my friend singing along outside. People sing when they are happy. Life is good"
" Day 1 in Cabo. Let me just say, before explaining my day, that I couldn't receive any internet and it kills me! I want you to know that I want you. I want to be with you. I'm happy with you and it's a given, it is something so natural. I tried to have the internet work in the lobby for a couple of hours, to wish you happy birthday, with no success. However, I did find some wild cats and managed to receive scratches all over my arms! I didn't actually realize that they were wild until I started 'playing' with them, and soon after had to run up on the lobby couch to escape their gnaws around my ankles. Anyway, don't forget to smile. Big bisous partout, Alex" ( so apparently I fell asleep after this message and I didn't explain my day. That happens the morning after)
"...I think throughout yesterday I changed outfits five times. Anyway- we decide to go snorkeling, and I take the wheel. I'm Jeeping through this one dirt road, zigzagging & sometimes hitting a flat stretch-miles of jungle green terrain (sorry but Donkey Kong's "home" seems to always pop up in my head). I can't help but have a giant smile on my face, my heart is pulsing and every inch of my body is alive and wired as I speed down these bumpy dirt roads, not knowing what lies ahead past each sharp turn...We climb aboard the Black Maria and stop at our first coral reef. I put my mask and flippers on and jump into the warm sea. The bubbles disperse and I am surrounded by a school of parrot fish- they are NOT afraid of me, and I am at once enamored and slightly frightened as I know that those strong bird-like beaks could totally chop off my finger. I was aware of that...On our way to the second reef we pass by a huge boulder of sea lions. They're just chilling in the sun, though my friend had the impulse to stop the boat and request that we dive and approach the lions. Awesome idea. 'Poof!' I'm in the water again. I see the colossal boulder in front of me and swim towards it, when suddenly those bubbles surround me again and as they begin to fade, a giant dark shadow slinks by me. I panic for a second- it's a sea lion. And it is HUGE. MASSIVE. And, I'm curious again. So, I decide to follow the massive sea lion and observe some sort of love dance that it was having with another lion. They were intertwined in a DNA-like structure, twirling and twirling in rhythmic circles. A good forty minutes go by of swimming with these sea lions. I sing to them under water, convinced that they can hear me. Though these creatures were massive they were gentle. And, they truly didn't care about us humans. That's the way it should be"
"My friend looked HAPPY today! It's working. My energy is transmitting to this person, finally. Thank goodness. I am doing my job. Also, I was in the lobby last night. It was dark, pitch-black, with night hawks and bats flying around, zipping up the staircases and hovering down over me. I was sitting on the floor with my cracked-screened Ipad, charging it in the only plug that I could find, under a lamp table. As I was waiting for my technology to awaken, I took my flashlight and shone it onto different spots all around in front of me. I stopped it on a Magic 8 ball, tucked and peeking out of a sand-colored basket, on a middle shelf across the room. I picked it up, then impulsively, without even thinking about it, asked a very important question. I wouldn't have been surprised with a 'No' or conflicting answer as obviously this was a Magic 8 ball and it is silly. However every single time I shook that ball, it came with the same answer. Every. Single. Time. Coincidence? Or, do I take it partially to heart because in reality I know what I want, and the Magic ball is a reassurance of what I do want? Interesting to think about."
There are many details about this trip that I wish I could share- however by now I've written quite a bit and some things are better kept for ones self. Although you may want to beg to differ, I actually DID work and shoot, three different series of photos. Though I don't mention those because I know that that was not necessarily my true purpose for being sent to Mexico with this friend. This friend needed a light, even for a moment, and if I was able to instill some sort of mental peace in this person, then I am happy, because that was my mission and I wanted for this person to feel alive. Like I do.
I am thankful for all of the blessings and opportunities that I have in my life.
And, I know that I have much to give.
X.
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